Confidence 👙

I have never felt so confident in my life…I went from feeling busted and combusted…to getting snatched! 🏋🏾‍♀️

Believe it or not…I never took pictures like this. EVER. 

Angled face shots were my jam 🤳🏾

I never thought I would ever be to the point where I felt comfortable putting on a bathing suit and taking a picture for all to see. I’m the girl…with the cover up. Or with shorts…or with a towel on…

Being over 266lbs…or even not knowing who you are…out me in this stuck place. And being stuck sucks.

It’s a paralyzing feeling…it’s the feeling that stops us from moving forward. It’s the feeling of procrastination and self sabotage.

It’s knowing what needs to be done and not doing it, it’s not asking for help, it’s thinking it’s for her and not me, it’s taking yourself out of the equation.

But why?

Because I didn’t feel confident. I didn’t know who I was…let alone feeling comfortable…about it. 

I thought being confident was talking about how confident you are… Chile…I can talk.

But my actions didn’t line up.

It was me not knowing who I am. And being confident in that. 

In reflection…I had it all along I just never realized it. You may be the same. I have never felt so inadequate. I remember telling my husband how inadequate I felt. In all my life. And in that reflection…I realized I didn’t know who I was.

I sat down and looked at my life and thought about all the times I did things for other people. The root of it was me doing things for folks in hopes of validation of love for me. Whew*

I needed validation from folks so badly. It was an addiction…and an idol. 

I wanted so badly to be accepted by folks. I wanted to be seen and heard. And sometimes…I still feel that way. But Daddy God is working on me. 

My validation comes from Christ Jesus. And what He says goes in my life…it’s what has brought me the confidence to post these pictures daily. And feel them…I enjoy them… before I post them!! So I don’t care…if you like them…I already have peace about what is posted. Amen. 

In addition to the Lord with me who I was I had to do the work. He puts His super to my natural and now I’m feeling amazing…and confident in the Lord. This is not a chip…is a deep knowing non who I am and whose I am…and being at peace with it.

I am who he says I am. And I’m loving my new body! I’m loving my new found energy…I’m loving everything about this journey…it’s been almost two years of this…

And I am finally seeing the end result. I’m not going to procrastinate. I’m going forward. 🏃🏾‍♀️

I’m taking folks with me…those who are tired of being stuck…tired of procrastinating thinking it’s going to fall in your lap…let’s go boo! Forward March! 💂🏾👊🏾